A few more of Dylan's deep thoughts

• You can lead a horse to water, and provided it is thirsty, it will get its own damn drink. 
• Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do. So maybe you just have to make an extra wrong.
• If it literally rained cats and dogs, it would either be the worst or greatest day ever for pet lovers. It depends on how hard the cats and dogs are hitting the ground.
• When Napoleon Bonaparte and the Duke of Wellington weren't busy fighting on the battlefield they were busy one-upping each other through food: the creamy napoleon vs. the meaty beef wellington.
• When the butter you leave out on the butter tray is just as hard as the butter in your fridge, you need to turn up the heat. Or move to a warmer climate.
• How did a bunch of backwoods ZZ Top rejects who make duck calls become the most popular show on TV?
• At first I thought Miley Cyrus had done a cover of Bruce Springsteen's "Wrecking Ball." I was sorely disappointed.
• What would happen if I tried to hashtag # on Twitter? Would that work?
• You cannot replace the term "Native American" with "Native Indian." Thanks for trying to make a compromise in the "do we call them Indians or Native Americans?" debate, but India Indians are native Indians.
• On that note, our nation's capitol has the most racist football team name ever. Change it. End of discussion.
• Never use store brand dental floss. Trust me.
• Vladimir Putin is like a Bond villain come to life.