The 49ers are coming...

So it has come down to this.

And really there could be no other way. No other result; no more fitting end. 

For this is the end. Brady's team is a ghost of its former self and Peyton suffers from playoff amnesia, where he forgets how to win in the playoffs. The winner in the NFC will become Super Bowl champion. And it was never going to be New Orleans, Carolina, or those other pretenders to the throne.

It could only come down to these two teams. And they plain don't like each other. 

The defending NFC champions - a kingly team with an illustrious history - must assail the mighty castle that is CenturyLink Field and overcome the usurpers from the north - a team of cutthroats that have bullied their way to the top.

I don't think I need to tell you who I'm rooting for.

From banners to billboards, from ticket restrictions to charity donations (?), the animosity between these two teams and their respective fanbases has steadily grown and now extends beyond the football field. Even the coaches have gotten into it before back when each of them coached in college. 49ers vs. Seahawks is the best rivalry in football today.

As you know, I live in the Seattle area. I'm deep in the heart of enemy territory. And let me tell you, I hate every moment of it! 

The Seahawks have risen to a point where they threaten to eclipse even the despised Dodgers on my  list of rival teams. 

Football season is made tortuous because I have to put up with Seahawk fans day in and day out. I could bear with the Seahawks turning into the dominant team of the NFC West if I didn't have to put up with the fans. This is the fanbase, after all, that literally prides itself on not only being loud obnoxious louts, but being the loudest obnoxious louts.

Everywhere I go I see that blue hawk staring at me with is sinister green eye. And all those 12th Man flags! The number 12 is my least favorite number now (by the way, Texas A&M called - they want their schtick back).

It's getting so bad that I'm becoming like a bull who has seen red. Only in my case the colors are blue and green. Every time I see something related to the Seahawks I change into a monster - my hair stands up, my eyes turn red, my nails lengthen and sharpen, steam pours out my ears, flames shoot-out my nostrils, and I start snarling and growling. The neighbors think there's a werewolf loose in the area.

There's no escape in the realm of cyberspace either. Every week my Facebook feed blows up with Seahawks stuff. On a weekly basis I see people, friends and "friends" of mine, reveling in their team's glory. The banter, the trash talk, the endless mocking of my team! 

Half of them don't give a damn about sports ordinarily. People I know who don't know the difference between football and cricket. Richard Sherman could walk into their home wearing a sign reading "I'm Richard Sherman" on it and they wouldn't know who he is. I dislike bandwagon fans for my own teams, so you can imagine how I feel about people jumping on an archenemy's bandwagon.

I've never been much of a praying man. But I beseech thee - God, Vishnu, Allah, Zeus, Buddha, Yahweh, Shiva, Cthulhu, anybody who will listen - strike down the Seahawks this Sunday!

The Seahawks are an unjust team, unworthy of football glory. They are the dirtiest team in football - rotten to the core, scoundrels everyone of them! I mean come on - seven suspensions in two years! Seven (and we all know it should be eight)! You could field a team made-up entirely from clones of Alex Rodriguez, Barry Bonds, and Toronto mayor Rob Ford and they wouldn't receive that many drug suspensions.

Oh, and those uniforms...ugh. They're almost as ugly as the Oregon Ducks football team (almost).

And do you really want to see this guy win? 

You really want to boost this guy's ego any more?

Seattle already tried to break my grandmother's heart by attempting to plunder Sacramento of its Kings. Luckily, fortune smiles on the weak and the Kings stayed where they belong. Now she'll be hoping the 49ers can exact some revenge on the city that put all of Sacramento through an emotional roller coaster ride.

Is that what you want Seattle? To crush an old woman's hopes and dreams!? Will that satisfy your bloodlust!?!?

So please let fortune smile on my family again and on the 49ers. Let Gore and Kaepernick find the open holes. Let our passes sail over the defenders' heads whilst delivering theirs safely into the hands of our secondary. Give Crabtree, Boldin, and Davis the speed to outrun the Hawks defense. And give Smith and Smith the strength to overpower the Hawks offensive line.

But most of all I pray that I don't have to put up with more months of agony at the hands of my tormentors. Seahawk fans have been insufferable enough these past 20 weeks. A victory over the Niners or (worse yet!) a Super Bowl championship would be unbearable. 

I pray because I know the odds are firmly stacked against the Niners on Sunday. A victory in Seattle might not qualify as a miracle, but it'd be close.

The Seahawks have the greatest home-field advantage in football (maybe all of sports). The Niners know this well from their last two visits to Seattle. Despite his small size and lack of notice, Russell Wilson is an excellent QB. Despite all their cheating, the Hawks defense is the most formidable in football. And despite his USC smugness, Pete Carroll is a good coach.

So football gods, I pray to you. Have pity on a poor 49er fan so far away from home. Think of it as a birthday present to me. Otherwise things around here will get so bad I'll need to purchase some blinders and some headphones like these for myself.